Dad, when's Mom coming home? She cooked the books better
Item: Top Enron theives get much-deserved vacations as guests of the United States Government. Mr. Fastow gets 10 years, Mrs. Fastow gets five months. She serves her term first so he can, ahem, stay at home with the kids until Mom's out of jail. When Mom gets home, she's on house arrest for five months while Dad goes and serves his time.

These assholes enriched themselves by almost $30 million by stealing money. It wasn't "creative accounting." It wasn't "shifting resources." It was stealing money. They deserve to rot in prison just as much as a petty thief does. Pardon me if I doubt their qualifications as parents.

And if, in those five months when his wife is cooling her heels at the federal spa, Mr. Fastow doesn't hire a babysitter and run off to some offshore tax shelter, I'll take back calling him an asshole.